VERY SAD “JJAJAJARVARDD” CASE!
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* FIRST THANKS TO THE WRITER AND TO BA-BAMAIL FOR LETTING US USE AND SHARE THE FOLLOWING STORY AND “JOKE” THAT WE RECENTLY FOUND IN BA-BAMAIL.
ALSO WE DEDICATE THE NEXT STORY AND “ESQUEZOFRENIA´S CASE PRESENTED BY BA-BAMAIL”, TO OUR MANY ENGLISH READING READERS. THANKS A LOT!
Noah, We Have a Problem…
Some years ago, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said, «Once again the earth has become wicked and overpopulated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans, thy sons and their wives.»
He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, «You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights.»
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Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard — but no Ark.
«Noah!» He roared, «I’m about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?»
«Forgive me, Lord,» begged Noah, «but things have changed. «I needed a building permit. I’ve been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system. My neighbors claim that I’ve violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.
«Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark’s move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.
«Getting the wood was another problem. There’s a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls — but no go!
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«When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space. I am required to apply for 834 different licenses to keep wild beasts on private property.
«Then the EPA ruled that I couldn’t build the Ark until they’d conducted an environmental impact study on Your proposed flood.
Further, the pitch to water-proof the ark has been banned by the EPA as inimical to the environment.
«I’m still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I’m supposed to hire for my building crew.
«Immigration and Naturalization is checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work.
The scaffolding to build the superstructure is not OSHA-approved and is forbidden to use except for private structures less than 5 cubits.
«The trades unions say I can’t use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience.
«To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I’m trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.
«So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 100 years for me to finish this Ark.»
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Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky.
Noah looked up in wonder and asked, «Does this sign mean you’re not going to destroy the world, oh Lord?»
«No,» said the Lord. «The government beat me to it.»
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REFERENCES
EDITORIAL NOTES:
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https://www.ba-bamail.com/jokes/religion-jokes/?jokeid=1431
* Neuman Praes Jacobo. “ESQUEZOFRENIA. UN MANUAL PARA UNA NUEVA VIDA. OCTAVO INTENTO”. JOEGA EDITORIAL. 2024. (Sólo disponible con el autor ya que está agotado en las librerías a las que se los di para que lo vendieran y como no pagan después de hacerlo, no se los volví a entregar) (Ojalá y lo leyeras y te curaras también de esta otra grave pandemia). También disponible en AMAZON.
* Neuman Praes Jacobo. “EL TOUR DE FRANCIA. UNA NOVELA MEXICANA SOBRE CALIDAD, PRODUCTIVIDAD Y CULTURA”. JOEGA EDITORIAL. 2004. (Sólo disponible con el autor ya que está agotado en las librerías a las que se los di para que lo vendieran y como no pagan después de hacerlo, no se los volví a entregar) (Ojalá y lo leyeras y te curaras también de esta otra grave pandemia). Pronto disponible en AMAZON.
* Neuman Praes Jacobo. “POR FAVOR DEJA DE FUMAR. Y SI NO LO HACES, NO EMPIECES”. JOEGA EDITORIAL. 2008. (Sólo disponible con el autor) (Ojalá y lo leyeras y te curaras también de esta otra grave pandemia).
